Titan's Pie Eating Contest
by dragonchikfan
Summary: Humorous one-shot about what would happen if the Teen Titans had an eating contest.  Slight pairings with RobStar, BBRae, CyBee, and Flinx.  Rated T because I am paranoid.


**I seriously had the inspiration for this story out of the blue, and I wrote the majority of it in only a couple of hours. Don't worry, I took the time to proofread this story more that once. Hope you enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans or any other affiliation of the DC universe.**

"Hello, and welcome to the first ever Titans Pie Eating Contest! Pizza pie that is. As contestants today, we have Kid Flash, the fastest kid alive, who boasts a personal best of seventeen extra large pizzas in nineteen seconds! Of course, he can't use his powers in today's contest." There were scattered cheers as the superhero waved to the crowd from the stage.

"Next we have one of Jump City's own heroes! We all know and love him, let's give it up for CYBORG!" The metal teen shook his fists in the air, earning the applause and screams of the assembled fans.

"Joining us today is everyone's favorite shape shifter, BEAST BOY!" The crowd went wild, with a bunch of fan girls holding up signs that said 'WE LOVE YOU BEAST BOY'. Beast Boy basked in their praise, in his element as he started break dancing in his own unique style.

"Coming to us all the way from the Arctic Circle is Gnarrk! This Titan can put away food faster than anyone I've ever seen. Let's hear it for GNARRK!" The crowd cheered, but wondered who this Titan was. None of the residents of Jump City had even heard of him. Gnarrk covered his head with a scared look on his face before he realized his mistake. The caveman smiled and cautiously waved one hand at Kole's prodding.

"We also have the privilege of having the brothers Thunder and Lightning as contestants hear today. These brothers really put the shock in shock and awe!" The audience groaned at the announcer's attempt at humor, but the brothers were given a standing ovation. Lightning and Thunder waved, striking a pose.

"And finally, joining us tonight is a very special lady I'm sure you all know. This Titan has nine stomachs and an appetite to match. Turn your attention to STARFIRE!" The princess blushed and waved as the crowd screamed, whistling and cheering.

Once the contestants were seated at the long table that covered the stage, the announcer read them the rules. "Now, during the contest, no one can use their powers to assist them in any way, whether it be to help them to take bigger bites," he looked at Beast Boy as he said this, "break the food up into smaller pieces," he glared at Thunder, who looked down at the table sheepishly, "or vibrate away the calories as you eat." Kid Flash grinned nervously as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Remember, our judges," Robin and Raven waved from the judges table, "will be watching closely to make sure the rules are followed."

"This is pointless," Raven muttered to Robin.

"Come on, it'll be fun," Robin said, still looking at the audience.

"Fine," Raven groaned, turning her attention back to the competition.

"Each of you has chosen the type of pizza you want to eat, and each of your choices has been approved. Our local pizza restaurant was gracious enough to donate fifty of each kind. You must finish the pizza you have before grabbing another box, and if you… lose your lunch, you are disqualified. The winner is either the first contestant to finish all fifty pizzas, or the one that eats the most before forfeiting. Everybody clear on the rules?" The teen superheroes nodded. "Then let the contest begin!"

The Titans smiled as each of their favorites was laid in front of them. Barbeque chicken for Kid Flash, Meat Lover's for Cyborg and Gnarrk, Veggie Lover's for Beast Boy, Spicy Italian for Lightning, with hot sauce replacing the tomato, Supreme for Thunder, and for Starfire, a pepperoni, mint frosting, and mustard pizza.

"Go!" the announcer shouted and the teens took off. Kid Flash was shoveling pizza slices in his mouth as fast as he could without using his super powers. Cyborg arms blurred as he gobbled up his meat covered triangles without even bothering to chew. Beast Boy was taking his time, relishing each bite of his pizza. Most of the time the team just ordered a cheese pizza for he and Raven to share, so he was enjoying being able to have his favorite treat.

Gnarrk ate steadily, devouring pizza after pizza at an astonishing rate, while Thunder and Lightning were staring at each other down, each trying to keep ahead of the other as they raced to finish their pizzas. Starfire smiled as she munched happily on her slices, taking the time to slather each piece with extra mustard.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes into the contest, Lightning keeled over, clutching his stomach. "I can't eat anymore. It's too much," he cried after he had finished most of his sixteenth pizza. A few minutes later, Thunder pushed away his plate, having eaten only two more pizzas than his brother.<p>

The announcer nodded at Robin and Raven as he started another round of commentary. "It seems that Thunder and Lightning are out of the contest. Kid Flash is still going strong, in the lead by two. Next is Gnarrk, and then Cyborg, who is down by only three slices. Starfire and Beast Boy are making their way slowly but surely through their pizzas but they have a lot of ground to cover if they want to be in the lead!"

* * *

><p>Five minutes later, Gnarrk turned a greenish shade as he ran from his twenty eighth pizza. Kid Flash smirked as he downed his thirty fifth, barbeque sauce covering his face. Cyborg smiled at Beast Boy as he had another slice of his thirty second pizza. "You're going down, grass stain."<p>

Beast Boy smirked back, his bottom fang poking out of his mouth. "That's what you think tin man." He quickly gobbled up his twenty ninth pizza, moving on to pizza number thirty.

"Ohh," Starfire shouted. "May I join in the talk of trash?"

The boys just looked at her. "Sure Star," Beast Boy said, "but I don't know if you-"

"You are both going in the downward direction. It will be I doing the kicking of the butt, and my victory shall be glorious!" She started laughing maniacally, lightning flashing in the background. Cyborg and Beast Boy just stared in shock, while Kid Flash glanced over at Thunder and Lightning who were chuckling over their effects. Starfire smiled sweetly as she continued eating her twenty fifth pie.

* * *

><p>Twenty six minutes into the contest, Cyborg looked queasily at his forty first pizza. "Get it away from me," he mumbled, stumbling off the stage to lean on Bumblebee. She pushed him away with a disgusted look, but when Cyborg's arm rested on her shoulder again, Bumblebee allowed it with a small smile.<p>

"How do you feel Sparky?" she asked with a smirk. Cyborg just moaned. "You know," Bumblebee started, "I was thinking tonight we could go out for dinner, maybe that new Italian place in Steele city..." She chuckled as Cyborg covered his mouth and ran off to the nearest restroom, clutching his stomach.

Kid Flash was on his forty seventh pizza when his stomach grumbled, complaining at its fullness. If only he could vibrate, run, something to stop the pain in his abdomen. He looked forlornly at the piece of chicken pizza. "I'll be back," he whispered to it before shouting "I'm out." Kid Flash took off, circling Jump City a couple of times to burn off the calories. He stopped, panting, next to Jinx a few seconds later, giving her a small smile.

"I told you this was a bad idea," she huffed, crossing her arms and turning her back on him. "This was just a waste of time."

"It wasn't a total waste," Kid Flash protested, putting a hand on the sorceress's shoulder. She turned just in time to see the rose he produced from behind his back. "I had time to get you this."

Jinx grabbed the flower, blushing. "Don't you have something to say to me?" the speedster asked, waggling his eyebrows.

Jinx thought about it. "You have barbeque sauce on your face," she said before turning around to watch the rest of the contest.

Kid Flash hastily wiped his face with his sleeve before dashing up to grab the lost little pizza slice he had left behind. "Told you I would come back for you," he whispered before shoving the piece in his mouth.

The announcer started his commentary again. "This is amazing folks! We are now down to two contestants, Starfire and Beast Boy! I don't think anyone predicted these two finalists. But they're not done yet. If neither of them can beat Kid Flash's record of forty seven, then he will be declared the winner!"

Beast Boy and Star looked at each other, a mischievous glint in their eyes. Starfire had forty two pizzas eaten while Beast Boy was on his forty fifth. The changeling's speed slowed down, allowing Starfire to catch up with him.

"Now this is what I call a challenge! The Titans are neck and neck. Who will win?" Beast Boy and Starfire continued to eat at the same pace, consuming their forty sixth pizza, and then their forty seventh. "They have just beaten Kid Flash's record. The speedster is now knocked out of the race."

The crowd heard Kid Flash moan before he devoured the rest of his fiftieth pizza. "Oh, be quiet," Jinx snapped, giving him a peck on the cheek. His disappointed frown turned into an earsplitting grin.

Simultaneously, Beast Boy and Starfire finished their final pizza. The crowd went wild as the two stood up, waving at their fans. "Congratulations Star," Beast Boy said, shaking the princess's hand.

"The congratulations to you too, friend Beast Boy," Starfire said with a smile.

Robin and Raven walked over them as the announcer spoke, "Amazing! Folks, it seems we have a tie. Our two winners are Beast Boy and Starfire!" The audience cheered, stomping their feet and whistling. "We all know the reason Starfire hung on for so long, but I think the fans would like to know; Beast Boy, how did you do it?"

The changeling blushed as a microphone was pushed into his face. "I guess I just have a really good metabolism," he said sheepishly. "How else can I still be this small from how much I eat?" The crowd chuckled at that as Raven and Robin handed the victors a huge trophy. They held it up, the screams from the crowd deafening to hear.

"Good Job Star," Robin said as he shook her hand. The princess glanced slyly at Beast Boy as she pulled the Boy Wonder into a bear hug, kissing him. The crowd 'awwww'ed, happy that the couple was finally together. When Starfire finally pulled away, Robin's cheeks were bright red. He was motionless for so long that Star's smile started to drop, worried that she had done something wrong. Then Robin smiled at her, kissing her more deeply this time.

Raven turned to Beast Boy, both trying to ignore the smooch fest three feet away. "Well done," the sorceress muttered.

"Thanks Rae," Beast Boy said, grabbing her hand. They smiled shyly at each other, blushing. Cyborg, feeling better after his trip to the bathroom, Bumblebee, Gnarrk, Kole, Speedy, Jinx, Kid Flash, and all the rest of the Titans ran on stage, pulling Starfire, who still had her lips locked with Robin, and Beast Boy, who refused to let go of Raven, on to their shoulders.

"You know," Raven said from atop their friends' shoulders, "maybe this eating contest wasn't such a bad idea after all."


End file.
